Foster on Film – Page 75 – The Film Criticism of Matthew M. Foster

Predator (1987)

Oct 101987

Major ‘Dutch’ Schaeffer (Arnold Schwarzenegger) and his commandos (Jesse Ventura, Bill Duke, Sonny Landham, Richard Chaves, Shane Black), along with CIA agent George Dillon (Carl Weathers), are sent deep into a South American jungle to rescue hostages. What they find is a previous team of soldiers skinned, and an extraterrestrial hunter.

One of the iconic alien invasion films, Predator is often, and unfairly, compared to Alien (or Aliens). If you hear someone tell you that this film is like Ridley Scott’s masterpiece, it means they don’t understand either film. Alien was an intelligent, psychological, sci-fi horror film—a haunted house in space. Predator is a simple, testosterone-driven, sci-fi action flick. The only similarity is the sci-fi part, and they are on opposite sides even there. There’s no exotic, beyond understanding creatures in Predator. There’s just a nutty, human-like critter with gadgets.

Judging it for what it is, with its goal of exciting, mindless entertainment for guys, Predator is a success. Even before the monster shows up, Arnold and company are supplying all the explosions and firepower needed for a good afternoon of beer drinking and movie watching. Once crab-face puts in an appearance (well, he’s mainly invisible early on), Predator is notched up to one of the best blood and bullet films made.

There is competence, if not brilliance, in every part of the production. The actors all ably pull off their roles as tough, paper-thin, killing-machines-turned-victims. It may not take a lot of acting skill, but the right type. Stan Winston’s creature has become famous, and rightfully so. Sure, it’s just a humanoid with a weird face and dreadlocks, but that’s what was needed. Director John McTiernan, who would go on to make Die Hard, understands that for an action film, pacing is the most important element. There are no empty moments, no slow points. Everything moves like lightning.

The biggest flaw is the Reagan-era South American anti-communist bit. In the ’80s, it felt like half the films being made were about tough Americans mowing down some reds in El Salvador. (You may recall the U.S. was supporting the fascists down there at the time). A bit less flag waving and a bit more extraterrestrial mayhem would have improved the film. Still, the commando section did give the audience enough time to tell the soon-to-be-victims apart before they were skinned.

Aliens, Reviews Tagged with: Three & 1/2 Reels

The Lost Boys (1987)

Oct 091987

A divorced mother (Dianne Wiest) and her two sons, Michael (Jason Patric) and Sam (Corey Haim), move to the coastal town of Santa Carla, the murder capital of the country. Michael quickly becomes mixed up with a beautiful girl and a gang, led by David (Kiefer Sutherland), all of whom have strange abilities. Sam meets Edgar (Corey Feldman) and Alan Frog, teenage comic book freaks who think of themselves as vampire hunters.

Vampirism is the perfect metaphor for teen isolation, particularly if you want to allude to drugs and sex. Vampires don’t fit into normal society. They have strange hours, can be violent, and are always searching for something. They also aren’t in control of themselves and no one can help them. The Lost Boys, the best of the teen vampire movies, is two films in one. Michael’s story is about teen angst, uncertainty, and desire, and is taken quite seriously. Sam’s is an over-the-top comedy, where theme takes a backseat to slapstick and camp. Director Joel Schumacher interweaves the two, giving a rest from intensity for laughs and then cutting back when the jokes are getting too silly. It works. A few of the gags do go too far, and a little Corey Feldman goes a long way, but the mix is just about right. This is a fun film with characters I cared about. Patric has the right amount of intensity for a lost half-vampire (and looks strikingly like Jim Morrison, a fact not missed by Schumacher who has an old poster of Morrison in the vampires’ lair as well as using People are Strange in the soundtrack) and Sutherland looks odd enough that I wonder if he really is a vampire. The climax is disappointing, going for a laugh instead of meaning (and sense), but as a whole, The Lost Boys is entertaining and emotional.

Reviews, Vampires Tagged with: Four Reels

Prince of Darkness (1987)

Oct 061987

Physics professor, Howard Birack (Victor Wong), brings a group of graduate students, including Brian Marsh (Jameson Parker), Catherine Danforth (Lisa Blount), and Walter (Dennis Dun), along with another colleague (Peter Jason), to an old church to aid a priest. Father Loomis (Donald Pleasence) has discovered a secret sect within the Catholic Church that has been guarding a sealed cylinder of green liquid for several thousand years, a cylinder that may contain an ancient evil. The texts found with the cylinder imply that religion may not be able to deal with the dark force, but that science is needed, and they don’t have much time.

Prince of Darkness takes Christian mythos and stands it on its ear. Yes, it says, God and Satan exist, Jesus did come to Earth to save us, and the Church holds the truth, but none of it means what we’ve always assumed. Jesus was really a…well, that would be telling.

Christian-based horror has the problem that it only works, as horror, for people with a specific set of beliefs. You have to believe enough to be scared by the concepts, but not too much or you’ll think that you’re safe due to Christ. That’s why the The Exorcist is so frightening to some people, but others just laugh. Prince of Darkness is Christian horror for a different group of people; it’s horror for scientists.

Director John Carpenter (Halloween, The Fog, Escape from New York, The Thing, Big Trouble in Little China, They Live, In the Mouth of Madness, Village of the Damned), wrote the screenplay under the pseudonym “Martin Quatermass,” claiming to be the brother of the fictitious British scientist hero, Bernard Quatermass, from the 1960s films. He tossed in enough scientific language to make the background believable (though Schroedinger’s cat is more likely to be discussed by excited freshmen than PhD candidates). For those of us who studied physics, it’s refreshing to hear this in a movie, though if you haven’t, don’t let it drive you away as it’s just techno-babble and is there for mood more than meaning.

Carpenter presents a credible explanation for all of religion, and then lets science and religion join forces to fight evil. The ideas pulled me in and left plenty to be discussed by anyone who wants to dwell on the philosophical implications.

While the beginning of the film is intelligent and thoughtful, about halfway things settle into a standard mismatched-group-stranded-together horror film, as people disappear and zombies and evil spirits pop up. It’s still above average, but it lacks the originality shown early on. I’d like to have seen all that science being pertinent in the final battle, but a heavy piece of wood and an axe turn out to be the way to combat evil.

Carpenter makes good use of his favorite players in the supporting roles, with Victor Wong and Dennis Dun (both from Big Trouble in Little China) being the standouts. Dun is particularly good, inserting a sense of fun into an otherwise serious film. Donald Pleasence (Halloween, Escape from New York) puts his usual loony persona into the gilt-ridden priest, cursing the universe and the church for lying to him.

However, the leads don’t do so well. Lisa Blount is drab as the girl we’re supposed to care for, but barely stands out from the characters with ten or fifteen lines. Jameson Parker is embarrassing, appearing to read his dialog off teleprompters and coming up with random, half-hearted emotions slightly out-of-sync with the lines. He was recovering from an injury while shooting, so perhaps constant pain explains his performance. Both Blount and Parker are handicapped with an underwritten romance that even at this late date should be edited out. Neither look like they are minutely interested in the other and their chatting has nothing to do with people in love. That sub-plot is irrelevant to the rest of the story and just takes up time.

The kicker is the chilling ending. Carpenter creates an image you are unlikely to forget and that pulls the film together to make it one of the best Christian Mythos movies.

Christian Mythos, Reviews Tagged with: Three & 1/2 Reels

Hellraiser (1987)

Oct 051987

When Larry (Andrew Robinson) and Julie (Clare Higgins) move into the old family house, they don’t know that Frank (Sean Chapman), Larry’s brother and Julie’s lover, will soon return from the dead and hide upstairs. It is left to Kirsty (Ashley Laurence) to deal with murderous Frank, traitorous Julia, and the demonic cenobites who are unhappy with Frank’s escape from hell.

One of the best horror movies, Hellraiser changed the genre. Before it, there was a string of Satan-themed fright films, but after it “evil” could come in more ambiguous and varied forms. Writer/director Clive Barker invented his own mythology. That mythology has stuck with me since first viewing, presenting more successfully than any Lovecraftian movie a vision of things best not seen.

Frank spent his life searching for something “more,” something truly exciting, and found a puzzle box that opens gates to worlds beyond understanding, worlds no one would want to understand. The forces on the other side of those gates are not traditional devils and have honor mixed with their cruelty.

The plot is engaging, the acting is excellent, and the camera work is astounding considering the budget, but it is in imagery that this film excels. The cenobites, lead by Pin Head, are makeup marvels. Pin Head has rightly become an horror icon and Doug Bradley’s portrayal, particularly his voice, is perfect for the powerful, amoral demon. When he says “We have such sights to show you,” I find myself wondering how extraordinary those sights would be, and how horrifying. The dangling chains, hooks, and blood add to the atmosphere. On top of all that is Christopher Young’s majestic score. This is gory filmmaking at its best, but not for the easily unnerved. “No tears, please. It’s a waste of good suffering.”

It is followed by the excellent: Hellbound: Hellraiser II, and then by the lesser Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth, Hellraiser: Bloodline, Hellraiser: Inferno, Hellraiser: Hellseeker, Hellraiser: Deader, and Hellraiser: Hellworld.

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Demons, Reviews

Wicked Stepmother (1987)

Oct 051987

A husband and wife (David Rasche, Colleen Camp) return from vacation to discover that her father has married a controlling woman (Bette Davis) who happens to be a witch. The old witch shares her body with a beautiful young witch (Barbara Carrera) and both work to destroy the family, and get rich.

Quick Review: Bette Davis must have felt desperate to take a role in this amateurish project, but that desperation didn’t cloud her judgment for long, as she quit after a week. In a foolish attempt to save the miserable footage they’d shot, Larry Cohen did a quick rewrite, adding in the beautiful witch, (Barbara Carrera) to explain Davis’ absence. It’s hardly surprising that the end result is of little interest, but it is probably better than the original conception as the most painful parts of the film are those with Davis. The once-great actress was sick, and any performance was beyond her capabilities. Watching this film is an exercise in watching a real person die. It’s sad, and that dampens any humor this ill-advised film supplies. Not that there was much there in any case—an old lady police line-up, a game show hostess licking the face of the winner, and the father’s first wife turning out to be Joan Crawford are all that comes to mind. The special effects are horrible and the cinematography is on par with the average sitcom, but those are minor problems when you realize this is basically a snuff film, done for laughs.

Reviews, Witches Tagged with: Toxic

Steel Dawn (1987)

Oct 051987

A lone warrior of the future (Patrick Swayze) becomes a farmhand for a widow (Lisa Niemi). With the help of the foreman (Brion James), the nomad has to defend the farm from a local strongman (Anthony Zerbe), his gang, and his hired assassin (Christopher Neame).

One of the many leather-clad, futuristic, desert films that came in the wake of The Road Warrior, Steel Dawn is a close cousin to Shane, complete with taciturn wanderer who would like to put his fighting days behind him, and a worshiping child. While Shane is given classic status, it was pretty silly stuff in 1953, and it is pretty silly here. It’s all clichés, following the formula without deviation. But we sometimes forget why these formulas exist. It’s because we like them. And Steel Dawn isn’t ashamed of calling up every old trick in the book (the noble one-on-one fight, the child in danger, the threatened woman, etc.). It is incredibly manipulative, and a pretty good time.

While no one is concerned with great acting, there are plenty of personalities on screen. Brion James (Blade Runner) and Anthony Zerbe (The Matrix Reloaded) are over-the-top in everything they do, which works perfectly here. Christoper Neame gives a surprising amount of character (and even a little depth) to the duelist killer—someone you’ve seen in a hundred films, but generally in a less enjoyable form. There’s even a young Arnold Vosloo (The Mummy) as a doomed henchman. Lisa Niemi (Patrick Swayze’s wife) fulfills her role of girl-to-be-protected. If she doesn’t do anything more, it’s because she isn’t required to.

And there is Swayze as the lead, playing this solitary warrior the same year he became a star with Dirty Dancing. It’s always difficult to tell in these kinds of movies if the actor is lacking, or if it’s just the part. After all, he’s not supposed to emote. What do you say about the talent on display by Alan Ladd in Shane or Clint Eastwood in High Plains Drifter? If you think it is award caliber, then you’ll be happy here, because it’s more of the same. Putting aside the tight-lipped uttering of monosyllabic dialog, Swayze has the physicality for the part. In this future, martial arts is the main form of combat, and Swayze’s dance background lets him do the jumps and high kicks with ease. For a low budget flick, the fight choreography is fantastic.

If you enjoy your combat fast and violent, your heroes silent, and your villains in fetish-wear, you’ll enjoy Steel Dawn. If you are looking for The English Patient, just keep walking.

Post-Apocalyptic, Reviews Tagged with: Two & 1/2 Reels

RoboCop (1987)

Oct 051987

In a near-future, crime-ridden Detroit, policeman Alex Murphy (Peter Weller) is murdered by a local gang. This is perfect timing for an unprincipled, wiz-kid moving up the corporate ladder at the corrupt Omni Consumer Products Corporation, which manages the police department. He turns Murphy’s dead body into a cyborg, RoboCop.

A prime example of cinematic Cyberpunk, RoboCop is set in a dystopian city, where the poor are helpless and amoral business executives do as they want, hand-in-hand with crime lords. Varying from literary Cyberpunk, the protagonist (do you call a cyborg, that is following a program for a large part of the story, a “protagonist”?) is a hero.

At first glance, RoboCop is the story of Murphy’s quest for his identity. He has become a machine and needs to determine what is left of the man. There is a shocking, blood-drenched scene of Murphy being shot apart (this is as gory as any film scene I can think of), several scenes of him learning who he was, and a long segment where he talks with his ex-partner, showing that he has almost regained what he lost. But this is just a frame, and only a part of the film. Director Paul Verhoeven spends little time worrying about who Murphy was (we barely meet him before he is dissected) and uses him whenever he wants another violent shootout. This is not a complaint as this movie has more important things to do.

Verhoeven is a master of cinematic sex and violence, both to convey a message and just for fun. In ’85 he created Flesh & Blood, an underrated tale of the confrontation between the Middle Ages and the Renaissance—punctuated by nudity, rape, and death—and like a magician, he made it fun. In 1990 he directed another of the iconic Cyberpunk films, Total Recall. For Basic Instinct, he dropped the comedy evident in his other works and went with a more traditional thriller, but using his trademarks. It all went terribly wrong in ’95 with Showgirls, which was filled with brilliantly shot scenes of naked bodies, but missing anything that was either meaningful or entertaining. Unfortunately, Verhoeven tends to be remembered for this mistake rather than his earlier triumphs.

RoboCop sits comfortably in that triumphant stage. The action is pounding and the violence is particularly gory, and they are used to comment on Reagan era thinking (which is pretty much the same as G. W. Bush era thinking). It isn’t the Christ-like Murphy (Verhoeven has commented that he sees RoboCop as the messiah, returning from the grave to save the downtrodden) that Verhoeven focuses on, but rather on The Old Man (Dan O’Herlihy), Dick Jones (Ronny Cox), Bob Morton (Miguel Ferrer), and Clarence Boddicker (Kurtwood Smith). These corporate leaders, and one crime-lord, represent what’s wrong with society (and that doesn’t mean just companies, but the thoughts and politics that support the disfranchisement of a large segment of the population). When an employee is gunned down in front of him by a robot with a glitch, all The Old Man can say is “I’m very disappointed.” That pretty much states the theme of RoboCop. The media is little better, and many of the film’s funniest moments are in the news reports that happily announce the deaths of hundreds and then cut to a commercial for a Battleship-type game where you nuke your neighbor. It’s all satire. Dark, bloody, satire.

Paul Verhoeven also directed the genre films Starship Troopers (1997) and Hollow Man (2000).

Cyberpunk, Reviews Tagged with: Four Reels

Near Dark (1987)

Oct 041987

Small-town cowboy-wannabe Caleb Colton (Adrian Pasdar) picks up pixie-girl Mae (Jenny Wright) sometime late in the evening (it’s hard to say when as time doesn’t work in this film). That’s a problem as she’s a vampire (the “V” word is never used) who converts him. He’s now stuck with her vampire family: angry man in a kid’s body Homer (Joshua Miller), the couple Jesse Hooker (Lance Henriksen) and Diamondback (Jenette Goldstein), and psychopath Severen (Bill Paxton). To live, Caleb needs to kill, and the band gives him a week to start acting like them or they will destroy him. Meanwhile, Calab’s father (Tim Thomerson) and little sister (Marcie Leeds) are on the road trying to find him.

This was it, the one that got away. I’ve seen every iconic vampire film as early in life as possible. For most, that means when they were released, and for those that came out before I was born, I caught up in the 1970s. But Near Dark was the one I missed. I can’t say why I didn’t watch it as those 30 years ticked by, but I never did. So it was with some excitement that I sat down to fill in this gaping hole in my cinematic vampire knowledge, and it was without that excitement that I now sit down to write about it.

There’s just not much to it. It’s fine, but I’d have been better off going in with lower expectations. Much lower. There’s no story here. They travel a bit, talk a lot, murder a little, and then Caleb escapes and we’re at a big climax that makes no sense. It even dodges any ethical dilemmas, so don’t go looking for theme. For a low-budget, no-big-deal horror film, it’s OK, but it doesn’t earn its status.

What Near Dark does have going for it is the cast, specifically Paxton and Henriksen. They are a lot of fun, and the reason to watch. They are creepy and funny and I’m sure are responsible for most of the good reviews. Director Kathryn Bigelow was married to James Cameron at the time of filming and managed to pull over main cast members from Aliens. Michael Biehn was offered the lead but turned it down due to the poor script; well, he knows his scripts, but it was unfortunate as Pasdar doesn’t have the charisma to stand even with his cast-mates.

But apart from the cast, there’s little here and a whole lot of distracting stupidity. None of these vampires would have lasted a month, much less a century, with their complete disregard for time. With sunlight the only thing they fear, I’d think they’d try not to get caught out at dawn, like they do over and over. But then it seems night doesn’t last more than an hour or so. Mae goes out for ice cream, so the parlor has to still be open. 8pm? 10pm? Whatever the time, they drive off for what seems like 10 minutes, but could have been an hour, and then it’s dawn. Sunrise is before midnight. Huh. They terrorize a bar. 10pm? 1am? Whatever the time, they leave and five minutes later dawn is coming. Sunrise is a flexible concept in this film.

Then there’s Caleb, who is an idiot. Hey, if you get away from some exceptionally violent vampires who care about being unknown, do you think just going home and hanging out with your father and sister and doing nothing about the vampires is a good plan? They know where he lives. But then the vampires seem to have no better plan than he does, once again, forgetting about dawn.

A few good actors aren’t enough. You need a script, and Near Dark doesn’t have one. I expected more.

Reviews, Vampires Tagged with: Two Reels

I was a Teenage Zombie (1987)

May 031987

A group of 1950s high school students, angry over being sold bad marijuana, inadvertently kill the local dealer, Mussolini, and dump his body in the radioactive lake. The water raises him as a zombie and he looks for revenge.

The ’50s monster movie satire is one of the easiest movies to make, and almost impossible to make well. “Nice” is about the best you can hope for and that’s more than I Was a Teenage Zombie can manage. Partly that’s because it’s never clear if this is a satire, or just a ’50s monster film made in the ’80s. As a satire, it needs to be funnier, or perhaps say something. As a straight film, it needs to be more frightening and engaging. Instead, it sets up wild characters in preposterous situations, and then wants you to care about feelings and relationships at the end. I didn’t care and I didn’t laugh. There were a lot of “almosts.” I’d nod and smile as the six (soon to be five, then four) teens tried to get pot from the insane dealer, when they did their fly resurrection with the radioactive water, and when they stored a zombie in the basement. If it wasn’t full of blood and the occasional blue-tinted zombie, I might describe the film as cute. For a zombie flick, or a satire, “cute” isn’t much of a recommendation.

I Was a Teenage Zombie might have been mild entertainment for someone who wasn’t demanding, if the production values were better. This is an unpleasant film to watch. Sure, a low budget indie isn’t expected to look crisp, but the grain here shows a lack of knowledge of cinematography, lighting, and purchasing film stock (16mm has never looked more like 8mm). Far worse is the sound. The muffled dialog is no better than something you could record at home using the built in mic on your camcorder or computer.

If you want a bit of comedy with your zombies, give Return of the Living Dead or Tracers a shot, and let this one rot.

Back to Zombies

Reviews, Zombies Tagged with: One Reel

Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987)

Feb 261987

Superman (Christopher Reeve) decides that he will free the world of nuclear weapons. Lex Luther (Gene Hackman) escapes from prison with a new plan: he will use Superman’s DNA to create an evil superman to stop Superman so that he can make money from weapons sales. Meanwhile, the Daily Planet has been bought, and the daughter of the new owner has a thing for Clark.

With Superman III a disaster in every way, the Salkinds decided to sell off the rights to the title character to the Canon group, makers of B-movies. This meant past feuds could be ignored: Margot Kidder could get some decent screen time and Gene Hackman could return. It also meant that Superman was no longer an A property. But a successful B-movie is better than a failed A flick.

Is The Quest for Peace a successful B-movie? Well, maybe semi-successful. It is certainly an improvement over Superman III. Christopher Reeve once again has a handle on the character. Lois is passable. Hackman’s Lex is fun, if dippy. And while Nuclear Man is far from a great villain, he’s a big step up from the AI monster in III. The film is still campy, but considerably less silly then its predecessor. We also get theme again, more so in any Superman film: not only the anti-nuclear message that Christopher Reeve wanted in the film, but also the problem with any single individual, no matter how good, making decisions, no matter how wise, for everyone.

Not that it’s all good, or even all an improvement. Money is an issue, as was planning. The budget was cut after the film was in production, so post production suffered. Things look cheap. The FX are not what they should have been, or had been. In parts of the film they get by, but at other moments the shoddy work overshadows everything.

Likewise editing was given short shrift. Enough material was shot for a three hour movie but much of it was left unfinished. Some of the material was horrible—the first Nuclear Man is a joke character that acts like a toddler—but there was also some character bits for Lacy (Mariel Hemingway) that would have made the film smoother. Over 30 minuntes of unused footage has been released but there was much more that we don’t know about. It’s impossible to say how much of that would have helped the final product. What is clear is that the film is choppy, with set ups for major events missing. But even if they’d had the cash, this was never going to be a great film. It is too simple, too childish. Lex’s nephew is a good example; he carries the candle for unfunny comic relief characters. He doesn’t cause too much havoc as his part of small, but any of him is too much.

Superman IV has to be evaluated using a different standard than the other Superman films. This isn’t for that big night out. This is part of a double feature on a Saturday afternoon screened at home. On those lesser terms, it is more or less, a success, or at least a huge failure.

It followed Superman, Superman II, and Superman III, and was followed by the semi-sequel Superman Returns. The character was rebooted by Zack Snyder for Man of Steel and Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice.

Reviews, Superhero Tagged with: Two Reels

Zombie Nightmare (1986)

Dec 061986

When a muscular, baseball-playing, “good” guy (Jon Mikl Thor) is run down by wild gang members (including Tia Carrere), the victim’s mother has the local voodoo priestess bring him back as a zombie for revenge. The police are confused, though Capt. Tom Churchman (Adam West) may have something to hide.

Why don’t zombies play more baseball? Do male, nipple-showing, heavy metal-playing bodybuilders become skinny, short-haired zombies if risen from the dead? Can someone commit suicide by breaking his own neck with his bare hands? These are the vital questions examined by Zombie Nightmare, a low budget—one might say primitive—picture made in that capital of zombidom, Québec. Jon Mikl Thor, muscle-bound leader of the heavy metal band Thor, stars (well, till he’s zombified) as a guy who doesn’t know to get out of the road. He also supplies music which often drowns out the dialog, but considering the dialog, that’s a benevolent act (considering the songs, maybe not). It’s easy to see why Adam West’s career didn’t take off after this, but the real shock is that anybody hired Tia Carrere with this as her first film. Sure she’s attractive, but I can’t see how anyone could be radiant enough to overcome appearing in Zombie Nightmare.

The true zombie of this nightmare is the DP, as the cameras appear to be tied off for large portions of the film. Every scene of the voodoo priestess in her closet of magic (looks like a closet) is shot from the same angle, without movement. Did the cameraman forget to move? Was director Jack Bravman unaware that moving pictures should move? Or had they all become the undead?

While one of the low points in cinema, Zombie Nightmare can be entertaining thanks to the good people at Mystery Science Theater 3000 who made it one of their better episodes.

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Reviews, Zombies Tagged with: Toxic

Poltergeist II: The Other Side (1986)

Oct 111986

Steve, Diane, Robbie, and Carol Anne Freeling (Craig T. Nelson, JoBeth Williams, Oliver Robins, Heather O’Rourke) have been forced to move in with Diane’s mother after their house was destroyed in Poltergeist. The spirits, lead by the evil Reverend Kane (Julian Beck), still want Carol Anne, and it is up to the Freelings and an Indian Shaman (Will Sampson) to stop them.

Quick Review: In reviewing this sequel to one of the best ghost stories filmed, should I consider the addition of an Indian shaman? Or yet another reason for the ghosts to exist? Or the tepid acting, with none of the family chemistry so evident in the original? Or the alteration of the family from average people to psychics? Or the fake dream-scares (couldn’t, oh, I don’t know…say, THE GHOSTS deliver the scares)? Or the cliché of the ghost calling on a child’s toy phone? Or the elimination of the older daughter (well, as the actress was murdered, the filmmakers can’t be blamed for that one). No, I’ll go straight to the ending, as that covers everything (yes, spoilers ahead). After attacks from a mutating giant worm, a flying chainsaw, and an army of ghosts, all the family has to do is jump into a big hole, hold hands and look at each other lovingly, and all is well. Well, Carol Ann still has a problem, but a winged Grandma floating in the puffy clouds of Heaven can take care of that. This saccharine, Hummel figurine finale is the stuff of bad, Christian-TV cartoons. It isn’t something that should be seen in a horror film.

I will give credit to the skeletal Julian Beck as the sinister, ghostly Kane, but as the actor was dying, it’s like watching a snuff film.

Ghost Stories, Reviews Tagged with: One Reel

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