Dec 061986
 
toxic

When a muscular, baseball-playing, “good” guy (Jon Mikl Thor) is run down by wild gang members (including Tia Carrere), the victim’s mother has the local voodoo priestess bring him back as a zombie for revenge.  The police are confused, though Capt.  Tom Churchman (Adam West) may have something to hide.

Why don’t zombies play more baseball?  Do male, nipple-showing, heavy metal-playing bodybuilders become skinny, short-haired zombies if risen from the dead?  Can someone commit suicide by breaking his own neck with his bare hands?  These are the vital questions examined by Zombie Nightmare, a low budget—one might say primitive—picture made in that capital of zombidom, Québec.  Jon Mikl Thor, muscle-bound leader of the heavy metal band Thor, stars (well, till he’s zombified) as a guy who doesn’t know to get out of the road.  He also supplies music which often drowns out the dialog, but considering the dialog, that’s a benevolent act (considering the songs, maybe not).  It’s easy to see why Adam West’s career didn’t take off after this, but the real shock is that anybody hired Tia Carrere with this as her first film.  Sure she’s attractive, but I can’t see how anyone could be radiant enough to overcome appearing in Zombie Nightmare.

The true zombie of this nightmare is the DP, as the cameras appear to be tied off for large portions of the film.  Every scene of the voodoo priestess in her closet of magic (looks like a closet) is shot from the same angle, without movement.  Did the cameraman forget to move?  Was director Jack Bravman unaware that moving pictures should move?  Or had they all become the undead?

While one of the low points in cinema, Zombie Nightmare can be entertaining thanks to the good people at Mystery Science Theater 3000 who made it one of their better episodes.

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