Oct 041960
 
one reel

During the final voyage of the liner Claridon, a boiler explosion rips a hole in its hull.  While Captain Robert Adams (George Sanders) and Engineer Walsh (Edmond O’Brien) first attempt to keep the ship afloat, and then get the passengers to safety, Cliff Henderson  (Robert Stack) struggles to save his trapped wife (Dorothy Malone).

All the tropes of the ’70s disaster flick are in place in The Last Voyage, a lackluster production which exists only to show how well constructed those later films were—something that is easy to miss without the contrast.  With far too many static shots of two-person conversations and crewmen running up and down stairs, the movie is surprisingly drab.  It ought to be able to drum up some excitement considering the multiple explosions, fires, and of course, the rushing water, but it doesn’t.

The Last Voyage appears to be an action picture, but is really a melodrama, with all the over-acting that implies (yes, by comparison, the people in The Towering Inferno are subtle).  Instead of action, the story focuses on the conversations of the crew and the angst of a man and his wife.

Robert Stack (best known as Eliot Ness on TV’s The Untouchables) is the straight-laced, all-American husband, which is unfortunate as he’s much better in tough-guy roles.  As he protectively holds his daughter, his expression and body language implies he wants to dash her to the ground, pull out some revolvers, and begin taking out anyone in his way.  He just doesn’t have the suburban vibe.  But then, if I had a daughter as annoying as his, I’d likely toss her into the nearest large fiery hole.  And he’s got to be tense, being married to a woman who only knows defeat.  I understand her giving up (eventually), and even wanting to sacrifice herself so that her husband and kid will leave her and get to safety, but that’s all she does.  Her first thought is, “Leave me here to die,” and that’s all she says for the next hour.  Even if you sympathize with her, she doesn’t make for electrifying viewing.

It’s not a complete wash.  The real liner S.S. Ile de France was used, and partly sunk, giving the movie a realistic feeling.  And there’s a proper sense of doom in the slowly flooding engine room.  But anything good is countered by the predictability of the story (you always know what’s going to happen as it will be the opposite of whatever the captain is sayings), and a pretentious and pointless narration, that pops in randomly to tell us the ship is sinking in the most overblown language.

If you feel the need to watch a ship sink, try The Poseidon Adventure.

Other reviews of films featuring George Sanders: The Son of Monte Cristo (1940), The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945), The King’s Thief (1955), Village of the Damned (1960).

Oct 021960
 
three reels

After burning down their school, the girls of St. Trinian’s are turned over to a “modern educator” (Cecil Parker) who is really being paid to kidnap the sixth form girls.  It is up to Flash Harry (George Cole), police Sergeant Ruby Gates (Joyce Grenfell), and the entire fourth form, to rescue them.

This third St. Trinian’s outing continues in the direction of the second, Blue Murder at St. Trinian’s. There is no real lead, and not much cohesion. Instead, it’s a series of vignettes loosely held together by the thinnest of plots. The girls are barely in the film and for the most part, can’t be told apart. The sexy sixth form girls, played by actresses far too old to be in boarding school, exist to be ogled. The fourth form girls are a force of destruction, and most of their onscreen time is spent with them yelling while they attack.

Joyce Grenfell reprises her roll as the enthusiastic and naive policewoman, and her routine is still funny, but there is nothing I hadn’t seen in the two previous outings. More time is spent on her romance with her uninterested boss, Sammy (Lloyd Lamble). Once again, she has a scoundrel acting as a second suitor, this time in the form of veteran Post-War British Comedy actor, Cecil Parker (The Man in the White Suit, The Ladykillers). Parker is a wonderful addition to the cast, and equals Terry-Thomas’s cad seducer from Blue Murder, although I would have preferred an original plot point.

George Cole is also back as the greasy, smalltime crook, Flash Harry, and is still funny, but a little Flash is all that is necessary. In both this and Blue Murder, less Flash would have been more.

By this point in the series, the originality was gone. And for a film that bases its comedy on playing with the concept of a girls’ boarding school, almost no time is spent in one. Still, there’s a lot of fun to be had in the devious schoolgirls and the helpless authority figures that have to deal with them. Plus, the sixth form’s striptease version of Hamlet should be the standard for performances of that play.

The other films in the series are The Belles of St. Trinian’s (1954), Blue Murder at St. Trinian’s (1957), The Great St. Trinian’s Train Robbery (1966), and The Wildcats of St. Trinian’s (1980).

 

Sep 291960
 
five reels

Aging Dame Beatrice Appleby (Athene Seyler), and her lodgers, a washed-up military officer (Terry-Thomas), a very butch etiquette instructor (Hattie Jacques), and a nervous china mender (Elspeth Duxbury), are caught in a meaningless routine until circumstances “compel” them to become fur thieves—for charity. The beautiful, ex-con housekeeper (Billie Whitelaw), the only one who knows anything about crime, is kept in the dark, as the misfits carryout a series of daring capers.

One of the best of the later Post-War British Comedies, Make Mine Mink takes the often used tactic of tossing a group of eccentric characters into a situation where they have to work together. Many films in the movement did the same thing, but few did it as well. While the predicaments the gang of thieves get themselves mixed up in are clever, it is the characters and inspired casting that makes the film sing.

Terry-Thomas, known for his stereotypical English, upper-class twit roles, was a wonderful comedian who was generally wasted, getting minimal screen time as the comical heavy or silly man-at-the-bar. However, as Major Rayne, ex-commander of a mobile bath unit, he’s front and center and shifts easily from slapstick, to quiet wit with ease. It is the best role of his career. It helps that he has Hattie Jacques as his main foil and companion.  In Britain, she was famous for a string of Carry On films, though she is nearly unknown in the U.S. Jacques is one of those actresses that makes me laugh no matter what she does.

But this isn’t just a Thomas-Jacques vehicle, but an ensemble picture where everyone has their moment and everyone excels.  It would be easy to lose the relatively normal character of the housekeeper (well, not so easy considering Whitelaw’s beauty), but she holds her own.  She is our introduction to the strange household and the anchor that keeps the film from drifting into absurdity.

Make Mine Mink is another of the movement films that celebrates the quirky and unconventional, but unlike the bulk of the pictures made at Ealing Studios, it shies away from the sentimental climax in favor of laughs.

Sep 101960
 
three reels

Gladiatorial-trainee slave Spartacus (Kirk Douglas) inadvertently kicks off a slave rebellion when Varinia (Jean Simmons), the girl he’s fallen for, is sold to a Roman senator. Spartacus leads a growing army that eventually includes Cixus (John Ireland), David (Harold J. Stone), Antoninus (Tony Curtis) and an escaped Varinia. Their goal is to reach the coast where they will take ships to freedom. Meanwhile in Rome, high born Crassus (Laurence Olivier) and his protégé Glabrus (John Dall) vie for power with populist Gracchus (Charles Laughton) and his protégé Julius Caesar (John Gavin), both using the slave rebellion as a lever. All the while slave trader Batiatus (Peter Ustinov) bounces around trying to find the best deal for himself.

It feels a bit strange slipping Spartacus next to other “not-so-great” films because parts of it are brilliant. And it’s seldom bad. But it’s inconsistent, stuffing together variations in style and quality that reduce the whole. Those mediocre moments, that would be fine in another film, look ridiculous when spliced with the genius work.

This is also a film whose cultural significance often gets it a pass on its flaws. The Hollywood Blacklist was already unraveling, but Spartacus tore it apart. The novel that the film is based on was written by Howard Fast while he was in prison, serving a sentence for Contempt of Congress for refusing to name names to the House Un-American Activities Committee. He had to self-publish the book as no one would touch it. But Douglas wanted to play Spartacus, so the rights were acquired. Blacklisted and communistic Dalton Trumbo wrote the screenplay, and unlike his works of the previous decade, was given screen credit. Right-wing groups protested at theaters, but when John F. Kennedy walked though the picketers, the Blacklist was over. Why Trumbo got that credit is unclear. It may have been for altruistic reasons, or due to fighting between star/producer Douglas, director Stanley Kubrick, and Trumbo. Whatever the case, the result is what mattered.

Though the clashes between the filmmakers may not have mattered with regard to cultural significance, they do matter for the coherence of the film. Besides general personality differences, and a schoolyard desire to be top dog, Douglas and Trumbo clashed over the theme. Douglas wanted a parable about the Jews. Trumbo’s plan was to examine communism, the cold war, and McCarthyism. Those things do not fit together easily. They do all lead to a lot of heavy-handed speeches, which Kubrick disliked. He found most of the dialog given to Spartacus false and annoying. He was right; it is. He also thought Spartacus was a poorly developed character, lacking in human frailty, but Kubrick wasn’t allowed to change things. He disowned the film, and made sure he was never in this situation again.

None of that is the starting point for even a passable film, but a few smart casting choices set things off on the right foot. Laurence Olivier, Charles Laughton, and Peter Ustinov are all wonderful. Laughton and Ustinov imbue their characters with humor and a degree of likability (tricky in the case of the slave trader). Everything they do and say is engaging. And Olivier is better, giving the finest performance of his career. It is hardly coincidental that Ustinov and Laughton have the best lines in the film as they re-wrote their dialog. Olivier also rewrote his lines, though it is unknown how much made it into the final cut. It helps that their sections of the film, mainly the politics in Rome, is smart and makes the audience feel a part of the deals and betrayals. If this had been the whole film, with only references to the Spartacus, it would have been the best film of the year and one of the true greats.

So what pulls it down? What doesn’t fit? The problems start with a horrible narration that implies Christianity wiped out slavery, though it took 2000 years to do so. It also gives us a few lies about Spartacus (no, the actual man was not born a slave) before thankfully vanishing from the film. (I mentioned that Spartacus is rarely bad—this is one of the times.)

Then there is the casting of the slaves, particularly Douglas himself. Olivier, Laughton, and Ustinov give their characters a reality and seem to inhabit this faux-Roman universe. Douglas, on the other hand, always had a hard time playing anyone other than Douglas, and here it’s particularly noticeable. With a strong director—or when his own power was weak—Douglas could do the job, as in The Strange Love of Martha Ivers. In Spartacus, Douglas had power, both as star and producer, firing the first director and hamstringing Kubrick. So Douglas appears not as a slave in a Hollywood Roman Empire, but rather as a modern guy from New York goofing around in play-armor. Nowhere in the film does he ever fit the part of a gladiator in 73 BC. That isn’t bad on it’s own (though it certainly isn’t good). The ‘50s and ‘60s are jammed with period pieces led by actors who felt like ‘50 and ‘60s era Americans (check out Kerwin Mathews in The 7th Voyage of Sinbad). But sticking Douglas next to Ustinov, Laughton, and Olivier and that inability is highlighted. Many of the other actors playing slaves do little better. Harold Stone comes off as a gangster. And Tony Curtis as… Tony Curtis.

The result is, once the slaves escape, none of their scenes work—with the exception of battle scenes where the camera has pulled back. Even the famous “I am Spartacus” scene feels silly, that is, until the focus is switched to Crassus. His understanding of what is happening, his fear (which Olivier captures perfectly), makes it something memorable.

And even a few Romans seem odd. Very American and questionable actor John Gavin seems to be in a different movie than Laughton, yet they share most of their scenes. He’s not great when he keeps his mouth shut. When he speaks, it pulled me completely out of the picture.

Originally the casting was supposed to tie into the themes, with proper Brits playing the Romans and less restrained Americans as the slaves, but that fell apart when some original casting choices fell through and proper Brit Jean Simmons joined the film. It doesn’t look like it would have worked if they’d managed to actually do it.

Like the acting, the cinematography is inconsistent, though here I’d never say it was bad, but simply the parts don’t work when connected. When we approach a battle (and it is pretty much always approaching as there’s only a few minutes of actual combat) or travel over long roads and hilly countryside’s, we get vivid, bright, realistic shots, using a healthy bit of real light. It looks epic. Any other time, we are clearly on a sound stage with artificial lighting, artificial buildings, and artificial landscaping. It couldn’t look more fake. There’s a scene where a couple is burying their child where there is no possible in-world source for the light. Fake scenery can work. The Ten Commandments always looks great and never looks real. The problem is the combination.

Composer Alex North’s score is reasonably good on its own, but not so much in the film. Its use is crude and obvious, and is likely to instigate a few giggles now. Sometimes it just doesn’t fit with a scene. At others, it overwhelms. Since there’s no hummable theme we’re suppose to pick up, the music needed to be turned down several notches, and given a touch of subtlety.

The result of all of this is an enjoyable. gem-filled, schizophrenic mess. I can’t even say it had potential to be more as it was doomed from the start. It certainly should not have won an Oscar for cinematography, nor been nominated for editing and score. However the win for Peter Ustinov is reasonable, though I’d have given it to Olivier, and with my Foscars, I do.

Aug 121960
 
two reels

Graduate student Shirô is a passenger in a car driven by his wild and apparently supernatural “friend” Tamura when it hits and kills a local thug. Tamura doesn’t care but Shirô gets very upset. Eventually Shirô decides to turn himself in to the police, but the taxi crashes on route (most likely due to Tamura’s influence), killing Yukiko, his fiancée. This drives her mother insane. Shirô is later picked up by an addict who happens to have been the victim’s girl friend. She and the victim’s mother plan to get revenge, but Shirô leaves town at that point to visit his dying mother. Shirô’s father runs a horrible old-folks home and keeps a mistress in the house. The doctor lets people die, the policeman is carrying out blackmail, and except for one woman who is the spitting image of Yukiko, everyone in town is terrible. And it would be a spoiler except it is the entire point: Everyone dies, most in improbable ways, and goes to Hell.

Jigoku is an odd picture—an art house horror flick where the small budget from a dying studio is as responsible for the look as any creative desires. The first two thirds are grim, slow, and spartan. There’s very little light and the sets look like sets. While cost is obviously the reason, one can attempt to explain away the problems by claiming we’re already in Hell, just an outer circle where sins are remembered. That or just shrug and figure they ran out of money.

The final third—in Hell—looks a lot more interesting, though it is just as austere. With strange angles, colored filters, and a lot of gore, the afterlife is an imaginative dream world. And it is that look, the blood, and the screams that made Jigoku a cult hit. Many in Japan think of it as the beginning of modern J-horror, something that is a bit hard to fathom when watching.

Though Jigoku has an interesting aesthetic in its final section, over all there’s not much there. The plot doesn’t hold together, which isn’t a problem in a film which is essentially just some sins and some torture, but then it needs something in its place. Theme doesn’t do the trick as while Jigoku presents sin and guilt, it doesn’t have anything to say about them. The characters are one note sinners, except for ShirĂ´ who is too passive to be of any interest. Which leaves you with the film’s selling point: shock. For 1960 Japan, this was considered very edgy, with bodies being sawn in half and people being “flayed.” But it isn’t shocking now. Jigoku is worth a quick look for the tableaus of Hell, but nothing more.

 Asian, Foreign Language Tagged with:
Jun 301960
 
three reels

Dr. Paul Talbot (Phillip Terry), an obnoxious, egomaniacal doctor wants nothing more than the wealth that a de-aging technique would earn him. Besides, he can’t stand old women, or even slightly older women. His wife, June (Coleen Gray), is a self-hating alcoholic (later narcissist). Malla (Estelle Hemsley — later Kim Hamilton) shows up to make a deal. She’s a 150 years old and wants to return to her African tribe. In exchange for the money to do that, she’ll show the doctor a powder which will prolong youth, and with an added secret ingredient will reverse aging. It isn’t long before the foul doctor and his naive wife have called off their divorce lawyer Neil (Grant Williams) are headed to the dark heart of Africa with guide Garvay (John Van Dreelen). They find the tribe, and first Malla, and then June are granted youth, but there is a high cost for youth, and it doesn’t last.

The title points to some strange monster sneaking around, but this is essentially a vampire film, once it gets past the African safari stuff. That travel material does bring up some questions about time. The film seems to take place in modern times (for 1960), but Africa seems set in the 1850s. Well, it’s amusing, so I’ll forgive the time problems. And the stock footage is obvious, but no more so than in fifty other films of the era.

Perhaps the greatest joy of The Leech Woman is how horrible everyone is. Malla is by far the least foul person, and she murders people without a blink. For a brief time it looks like Garvay, and maybe Neil will be OK, but nope, they are atrocious too. This is a group of greedy, cruel, shallow, cheating slime bags. Their particular failings fall somewhat along gender lines, but then the film is commenting on society’s views of beauty. It can be read either as a feminist statement or as a sexist statement and has been taken as both.

1960 was far past the glory days of Universal horror. The great directors were gone, as was the cash and concern. They weren’t going to make a masterpiece, but for the times, this is pretty good, and the the studio allowed for better cinematography then the budget would normally allow, as well as first rate editing. The acting is very broad but enjoyable; John Van Dreelen and Grant Williams were solid second-tier actors, while Gray is a hoot. The script isn’t a classic, but has a few quotable lines and plot-wise gave me exactly what I wanted: nasty things happening to nasty people who deserved every nasty second of it. The Leech Woman is better than it has any right to be and fitting for a double feature with The Creature From the Black Lagoon.

 Horror, Reviews, Vampires Tagged with:
May 101960
 
four reels

Marcello (Marcello Mastroianni) is a playboy and entertainment reporter, living adjacent to the rich and famous, and though that proximity and his own charms, he is living the sweet life. He hangs out at night clubs, bars, and parties, often with Paparazzo (Walter Santesso), his photographer, at his side. In the course of a week, he has a liaison with a rich woman in a prostitute’s flooded apartment, ends up in a fountain with a movie star (Anita Ekberg), covers a story of children claiming to have seen the Virgin Mary, takes his ignored and overdosing girlfriend (Yvonne Furneaux) to the hospital, takes his father to a club where he hooks up with one of Marcello’s ex girlfriends, hangs with the intellectual elite, and hitches a ride with an acquaintance to a castle where the truly rich and bored search for new indulgences.

If you have never seen La Dolce Vita, but know it only though the images that have made it into general pop culture—Anita Ekberg standing in the fountain or dancing without her shoes, the statue of Mary being dragged through the sky by a helicopter, Mastroianni hanging out at one club or another hitting on women—you likely think this is a comedy or romance, or at least a moving, light drama. The title means “the sweet life” after all. And the bits with the reporters (the word “paparazzi” came from this film) are biting and darkly humorous.

But La Dolce Vita is a melancholy affair. It competed with fellow Italian release, L’Avventura to capture ennui, and while it might have lost that race (L’Avventura is unrelenting in its despondency, a film that feels like a ghost story, without the ghost, unless everyone in it is a ghost), it ends up hitting harder. La Dolce Vita sparks with energy, points out possibilities, sucks you in… And then it gut punches you. And after it’s done that several times, it finally settles into the gloom that was always there, but hidden by the imitation of life. Sound dour? It is. The film is fun to watch, until it isn’t. There was something in the water in Italy at the turn of the decade.

La Dolce Vita (like L’avventura) examines the world via the idle rich, though it doesn’t suggest that either being rich or idle is the problem; it’s just that the rich lack the distraction of having to scramble to survive, so the emptiness of life is more apparent. The problem is alienation. No matter how much Marcello mixes and plays and intertwines with others, he’s fundamentally alone. And he’ll always be alone.

Yes, dour. But it’s beautiful, and it makes its point. In fact its only real flaw is it makes that point too well. About half of the third act could have been cut as we’ve seen it all and know exactly what it all means. Both the castle event and the final party drag. Poor editing pulls the whole down, but it was so high before that it can handle it, with the result a must-see film.

 Miscellaneous, Reviews Tagged with:
Mar 141960
 
two reels

Obnoxious American business expert Angela Barrows (Constance Cummings) runs into Robert Macpherson (Robert Morley), whose just taken over as head of his family’s Scottish tweed company. She sets him on the route to innovation, but that goes over poorly with the extremely conservative men-only workers and the reactionary Mr. Martin (Peter Sellers). Martin set out to sabotage the changes.

Director Charles Crichton and a few of his old Ealing Studio compatriots get together for a mild satire that just never gets going. It looks good, and all of the supporting characters excel, but it limps along, never daring to be anything more than nice. There’s no laughs and only a few smiles. The problem is the gags are all nasty tricks against either the old-timers or Barrows, and for those to be funny, you have to be on someone’s side. But all these folks are terrible. We are supposed to side more with the men, though it is hard to see why besides they are “quaint.” Ealing made an art of showing quaint people, but Ealing had gone bankrupt and the magic isn’t there.

It’s easy to blame Sellers, and I’m happy to take the easy way out. He loved putting on his old man makeup and shuffling about and I suspect he was far more interested in his own little game than in the film. He’s good at it. He always was, but that doesn’t make it entertaining. With Cummings purposefully being annoying (because women in the workplace are always annoying—yeah, its more than a bit dated, and was in 1960, which I suspect contributed to its poor box-office), and Sellers doing his own thing, it’s left to Morley to put some fun into the proceedings, and he does his best, but it isn’t enough.

I’m a bit harsh on a well-made and (generally) well-acted film, but the problem is one of expectation. In every way, this should have been a better film. So count it not as a bad film, but as a disappointing one.

Charles Crichton’s other Post War British Comedies are Hue and Cry (1947), Another Shore (1948) Dance Hall (1950), The Lavender Hill Mob (1951), The Titfield Thunderbolt (1953), and The Love Lottery (1954). He returned to directing after a more than twenty year hiatus for A Fish Called Wanda (1988).

Peter Seller’s other Post War British Comedies are: Orders Are Orders (1954), Heavens Above! (1963), The Ladykillers (1955), The Smallest Show on Earth (1957), The Naked Truth (1957), Carlton-Browne of the F.O. (1959), I’m All Right Jack (1959), Two Way Stretch (1960), Only Two Can Play (1962), The Wrong Arm of the Law (1963)

Nov 071959
 
three reels

Obsessive archeologist John Banning (Peter Cushing), and his even more obsessive father, ignore the standard “all who open this site will die” warning and enter an obscure Egyptian tomb.  Banning Sr. is found babbling soon thereafter, and it is not long before Kharis (Christopher Lee), an ancient high priest turned mummy, is strolling the streets of England, eliminating all who desecrated the tomb. The police won’t believe a word of Banning’s superstitious–though calmly delivered–drivel.  Good thing his wife happens to look like an ancient Egyptian princess.

In the late ‘50s, Hammer studios struck gold with their re-imaginings of Frankenstein and Dracula.  A deal with Universal allowed them to go for remakes of the 1930s and ‘40s classics, adding in their own lush color and semi-eroticism. They chose not the original 1932 Mummy to recreate, but its two semi-sequels: The Mummy’s Hand and The Mummy’s Tomb, combining those films, and removing the romance and comedy. The result is passable entertainment, improving on its source material, but still a bit stale and low rent in 1959, and now as moldy as Kharis’s rags.

Fans of Hammer films will be pleased to see both Cushing and Lee together once again.  They had already been adversaries as Dr. Frankenstein and his Monster, and as Van Helsing and Dracula, and here they face off once again, and once again, Cushing gets most of the lines.  Lee does the best he can as the most un-Egyptian of Egyptian high priests (he doesn’t even attempt a faux accent, speaking with his normal, regal, and very very British inflections in flashbacks, and not at all once covered with bandages).  The make-up is not his friend, making his mummy far from frightening or believable—less a terrifying monster, and more a gangly actor shambling about in a mid-range Halloween costume.

Cushing has a lot more to do and comes off better, rising above mundane material. His portrayal of a faux-Victorian scientist is as believable as anything can be, or should be, in this fluffy horror flick. Though he has a reasonable number of lines, he doesn’t really do a whole lot since Banning merely reacts to situations.

The film is aided by the always good character actor, Raymond Huntley (The Great St. Trinian’s Train Robbery, The Pure Hell of St. Trinian’s, Make Mine Mink, The Green Man) as an uncle, doctor, and dead-man-walking. The rest of the cast do their bit, and draw little attention, good or bad.

The Mummy, like all early Hammer Horror films, has its fanatical supporters, but anyone younger than 50 is not going to be impressed by the fact that once upon a time it was remarkable to have vivid color in a horror film. It is an attractive enough movie, though those same colors do accentuate how fake the Egyptian scenes are.  Casting away its historic importance (which isn’t that great as it came after Curse of Frankenstein and Horror of Dracula), you are left with a standard mummy flick, carried out with middling skill, lacking in scares, but supplying a few smiles. When compared against other mummy films, it comes off well, but that’s not overwhelming competition.

Hammer’s “Mummy cycle” included The Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb (1964), The Mummy’s Shroud (1967), and Blood From the Mummy’s Tomb (1971).

 Mummies, Reviews Tagged with:
Oct 081959
 
one reel

Drunken moonshiner Lem is out for his daily otter poaching run in the swamp when he is attacked by a vicious-looking Hefty bag.  No one believes his story, except the Hefty bag, which kills him a few scenes later.  Things then switch over to sweaty hillbilly Dave (Bruno VeSota) and his hot, white-trash wife, Liz-Baby (Yvette Vickers).  They have all kinds of trouble, including Liz-Baby’s affair with another redneck, but all that comes to an end when several enraged plastic bags do away with Liz and her lover, and the local stereotypical sheriff locks up Dave.  With all of the major characters removed from the plot, we’re stuck with white bread Steve Benton (Ken Clark), his bland but still annoying girlfriend, Nan (Jan Shepard), and her doctor father (Tyler McVey).  Doc is sure that there are monsters afoot, and the best way to find them is to drop dynamite into the swamp (really; that’s presented as a reasonable step).  The tactic does uncover the dead yokels, which means its time for Steve to strap on an oxygen tank and go diving to face the bags, and save humanity.

In general, I like my giant monster movies to have gigantic monsters in them, but I suppose I can be generous, at least with regard to what counts as being huge.  When the atomically enlarged creature is a leech, a man-sized monster is pretty big.  But that’s the extent of my generosity.  Hey, the filmmakers weren’t generous to me, displaying uncommon stinginess with talent and skill,  so why should I extend the courtesy to them?

There’s the potential for an hysterical, cult film, with the zany hillbillies, sexy Yvette Vickers playing the sleazy wife, a doctor with an explosives fetish, and the title: Attack of the Giant Leeches.  That’s all it is, potential.  The hillbillies don’t get enough screen time.  The first half of the picture plays like a soap opera performed by the cast of Deliverance, but it comes to nothing.  The sleazy wife isn’t nearly sleazy enough; her scenes might have been pretty wild for 1959, but come off as prudish by the early 1960s, and are forgettable today.  The doctor’s bizarre need to blow up wetlands isn’t nearly extreme enough.  Most of the doc’s time is spent in tedious discussions with the hero, while his daughter whines.  I didn’t use a stopwatch, but I wouldn’t be surprised if more than half of the film is spent on these stagnant chats.

However, the title is the one unqualified success.  Without it, most viewers would be flailing, trying to figure out why plastic garbage bags, sculpted with Mr. Bill faces, are attacking rednecks.  But the title explains that those garbage bags are supposed to be giant Leeches.  How else would you know?  They don’t look like leeches.  They look like guys wearing plastic sacks.  And they don’t act like leeches.  They act like guys stumbling about inside bags.  So telling the audience is the only way.  That doesn’t make the leeches any more entertaining, or the entire film any less plodding.

Shot on poor quality film stock, with sluggish camera work and inappropriate lighting (the only way to tell if it is day or night is to guess), this is an amateur operation from beginning to end.  The dialog is no better than the monster design.  All these flaws make it ripe for MST3K-style viewing, which is the only way to get any fun out of it.  While it did make it onto that program (I haven’t seen the episode), I’d suggest getting a few friends together and going at it yourself.  It isn’t as if you need to be a professional to find ways to rip Attack of the Giant Leeches apart.

 Giant Monsters, Reviews Tagged with:
Oct 081959
 
two reels

Years after the events of the original film, Philippe Delambre (Brett Halsey) uses his father’s notes to create a matter transmitter.  Aided by his reluctant uncle François (Vincent Price) and his friend, Alan Hinds, he succeeds.  But Alan is really a murderer who plans to steal the device.  When Philippe learns of the treachery, Alan puts him into the transporter along with a fly.

I don’t recall seeing a b&w sequel to a color film before.  A cheaply and quickly made follow up to The Fly, color isn’t the only thing missing.  So are special effects, sympathetic characters, and all but one qualified actor.  Vincent Price returns, obviously only for the money, to stand around and look disturbed.  I can’t say if it is from the dangerous experiments performed by Philippe or from the script.  Brett Halsey looks enough like David Hedison (who played the inventor in the previous film) to be his son.  That’s the only “talent” Halsey displays.  Perhaps if some time had been spent developing his character, he might have managed more than one expression.  But instead, time is spent in a complicated plot designed to get Halsey into a giant fly mask.  It’s not an interesting plot, just convoluted.

The filmmakers of The Fly were clever enough to show their underwhelming fly head only briefly, but such sense wasn’t in play in The Return of the Fly.  The gigantic, papier-mâchĂŠ head, three times the size of the mask in the first film is shown repeatedly in bright light.  Don’t think “frightening monster”; think “guy in a Mickey Mouse costume at Disney Land.”  There are times when the poor man nearly falls over from the weight of his huge false head.

Plot holes abound, and characters have neither sense nor motivation.  The police are particularly frightening in Montreal where it seems you can put out orders to “shoot to kill” with no provocation.  Luckily, the police are incompetent, unable to find a fly-person wandering about the city.  I’d think that would be hard to miss.  It’s not a subtle look.

The strongest compliment I can give Return of the Fly is that I’ve seen worse.

Back to Mad Scientists

Oct 061959
 
two reels

Gil McKenna (Robert Clarke), an alcoholic research scientist, is exposed to a new kind of radiation that causes him to change into a scaled creature whenever he’s struck by sunlight. Ann Russell (Patricia Manning), a colleague with more than a scientific interest in Gil, tries to find a cure. The overly-emotional Gil spends his time drinking and picking up an attractive bar singer (Nan Peterson), both of which lead him to end up in sunlight.

I try to critique and review films objectively. I have reasons for liking films (i.e. it’s not all just opinion). I study each film, evaluating it. Does if have a valuable theme? Does it present it in a way which illuminates the subject and allow the viewer to see it in a new way? Is the story original? Is it at least competently made, that is, does it demonstrate that the director and crew we’re skilled in their jobs? Were there exceptional lighting techniques used that aided in creating a mood and advancing the theme? I could go on.

But then I get to The Hideous Sun Demon and I can’t watch it as a blank slate. I saw it first when I was very young, and outside of the Universal classics, I hadn’t seen a humanoid monster movie. Oh, there were insane killers, gothic ghost stories (which normally came down to insane killers), unseen spirits, killer cockroaches, lizards, aliens, atomic dinosaurs, and any number of other less-intriguing horror oriented apparitions, but no old fashioned monsters. Later I’d find the Hammer pictures and I Was a Teenage Werewolf, but for a brief time The Hideous Sun Demon was it for “new” monsters. And I loved it. It had it all: a questionable protagonist, a hot blonde with lots of cleavage, bad guys who got killed right when they think they are soooo tough, a fall off a high tower, and a first class rubber suit. Well, it was mainly the suit.

So, how does it hold up these many years later? It’s hard to say as I go into it with a favorable slant. But, trying my best to filter that, the alcoholic theme still works. Gil is not a great guy. He drinks and he’s not big on thinking things out. In addition to the straightforward comments about his hangover causing the accident and his repeatedly popping up at bars, the transformation can be taken as a statement on alcoholism. Gil’s nice enough and certainly charismatic normally, but he can’t seem to help going out in the sun, and after a few shots of sunlight, he’s surly, violent, and abusive.

The Noir flavor nearly works. The cinematography isn’t skillful enough for that to be an unqualified success, and the criminals are too broad and clichĂŠd, but then that was true in any Film Noirs shot by 1959.

And then there is the suit. Sure, it’s rubber. Sure, we can do much better now. But it’s a cool monster suit anyway you look at it. I also love that it is sunlight that changes Gil into a monster, not the moon or darkness. I can’t figure why there haven’t been more films that focused on the evil of the sun. I’m a night person myself, and like in most vampire movies, I’m not sympathetic to Gil’s whining about not being able to go out in the day. Who wants to go out in the day?  The bright light washes out all the color, the best clubs are closed, and you might turn into a monster.

A few things don’t work so well: the static camera whenever anyone other than Robert Clarke (who not only stars, but wrote and directed) is onscreen; the uninspiring dialog; the random acts of stupidity (such as Gil driving a convertible); the day for night scenes that just look like day; the feeble fight choreography; the medical doctor that breaks into an inaccurate explanation of evolution when asked how Gil is doing; the reduction of the size of LA—one murder has all the citizens of the city on edge and every road is blocked; the muffled sound. But what are any of those compared to a cool monster suit?

So, for my rating, I’m splitting the difference between my enjoyment and what I think it really deserves.

I have a question for anyone who lived in LA in the late ’50s—what where the zoning regulations like? In The Hideous Sun Demon, there is oil drilling in residential areas and it looks like it was filmed on location.  Perhaps I missed the point of the film. Perhaps it is a plea for better zoning, to save the children. Think about it…

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