This week, our plucky hero Flash (Sam J. Jones), along with new girlfriend Dale (Melody Anderson) and the genius Dr. Zarkov (Topol), journey into space to stop the emperor Ming the Merciless (Max Von Sydow) from destroying Earth. Will Flash be able to resist the lascivious advances of Ming’s daughter (Ornella Muti)? Will he be able to combine the forces of the prince of the tree people (Timothy Dalton) and the lord of the hawkmen (Brian Blessed)? Don’t miss the exciting adventures of Flash Gordon to find out!
Flash Gordon isn’t bad for what it is, but what it is isn’t much. When you start with the idea of a camp space opera—recreating nothing more than was done in the 1930s serials and the comic strips—if you attain your goal, you can still only be so good. Flash Gordon does hit the bull’s-eye as a good natured, brainless, homage to past sci-fi. It sits uncomfortably in that spot between embarrassing and cult classic. It’s a cinematic take on a drag show—garish, loud, shiny, sometimes funny, sometimes stupid, and not something you’ll talk about with your overly proper Aunt Gertrude.
It’s in the design where the flick is at its best. The art deco spaceships and brightly colored costumes capture the 1930s era vision of the future while looking far more impressive than anything from the real time period could have. It’s hard not to get swept up in the fun of golden-masked evil-doers, and slave girls in chainmail bikinis.
The acting can’t live up to the sets, but quality acting would be out of place. Max Von Sydow is the standout, somehow striking a delicate balance of high camp and sophistication. He’s the evil Ming that any fan of the original comics (are there any fans still alive?) would have wished for. Sam Jones looks the part of Flash, and does his best, but it isn’t enough. It’s not clear if Jones lacks the skill to bring the character to life or if the script didn’t allow him to. I’m inclined to split the blame. You are left with the impression that Flash is a big, dumb, Duddly Do Right, but he could be a part time brain surgeon or an escapee from a mental institution for all the development he’s given. Melody Anderson, Topol, and a very sexy Ornella Muti, all look like they are having a blast, and supply just enough personality to their respective characters. On the other hand, Brian Blessed (Much Ado About Nothing, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves) is having too much fun. Never a subtle actor, he seems to think the audience is made up of hard-of-hearing eight-year-olds. Nobody told Timothy Dalton (who was later stuck with the worst James Bond scripts) that this was supposed to be silly fun, so he attacks it with an earnestness normally reserved for Shakespeare (and then, only the tragedies). When Dalton, Blessed, and Jones are onscreen simultaneously, any illusion of coherence is lost.
With the addition of an unforgettable soundtrack from Queen (really, you can’t forget it, no matter how much you try; go ahead, listen—it will be with you till you die), Flash Gordon stakes its claim to the title of ultimate pointless spectacle. It never reaches the mindless pleasure of the similar Barbarella, but has its own gaudy charm.