At the funeral of his sister, Karin, Ben (Reb Brown) is informed by werewolf-hunter Stefan Crosscoe (Christopher Lee) that his sister was a werewolf. Ben doesn’t believe until he and news reporter Jenny (Annie McEnroe) are attacked by werewolves. The three join forces to travel to Transylvania to kill the leader of all werewolves, Stirba (Sybil Danning).
Here’s a film that goes by both Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf and Howling II: Stirba—Werewolf Bitch. I’m not sure I have to go further with this review. Think about it. The people connected to this project thought that both Stirba—Werewolf Bitch and Your Sister Is a Werewolf were good titles. These are not people with fine judgment.
But, to demonstrate my deep concern for you, gentle reader, I will continue.
This, by any name, smells bad. It has no connection to the far superior The Howling except for claiming a character is a sibling to one in the first film. With a new and inferior director, an insufficient budget, and a different tone, Howling II ignores everything done right four years earlier. It also ignores the first film’s mythology, creating werewolves that cast magic bolts, suck the souls out of young girls, and die only from titanium, preferably in spike form. It also has warrior dwarves throwing knives, weird Road Warrior-like Viking helmets, and a techno band. There is an attempt to add an erotic werewolf ménage à trois, but the makeup isn’t up to the challenge and it looks like drunken furries flopping about. A larger werewolf orgy is almost entertaining (everyone stays in mainly human form with only fangs and contacts to make them wolf-like), but it is intercut with the previously mentioned techno band playing from a much earlier club scene. Perhaps this is supposed to be a metaphor of some sort: club dancing is like werewolf sex. Hmmmm. That doesn’t help much, does it?
Christopher Lee plays his mysterious werewolf hunter as if he is reading a ghost story to children. Every word is of the utmost importance. It makes no difference if he is declaring the evils of the Devil or if he is asking for more tea, it all sounds deeply dramatic. Lee in voice-of-God mode is teamed with Reb Brown and Annie McEnroe. They are professional actors. I know this because I looked it up (and I recall Brown from his stint as Captain America). There is no other way to tell. I’ve never seen performances this bad where a paycheck was involved.
With a ludicrous plot, horrible acting, and laughable effects, the only thing Howling II has of interest is a few nice locations in Czechoslovakia (standing in for Transylvania) and the frequent exposure of breasts. While several different wolf-babes go topless, it is Sybil Danning who dominates, and she is impressive. She also does the best job of acting, reciting her lines almost as if they meant something and walking around in a leather jumpsuit covered in mirrors like it was a natural thing to do. She is the only one connected to this film who shouldn’t be embarrassed.
The director (or producer, or just some hack who took over this project) also realized Sybil Danning and her bust was the closest thing to depth Howling II had, so repeated her bodice-ripping/bosom-revealing scene in the end credits. As the film has two names, I wonder how many different cuts there are, because I’ve read different reviews stating that this pivotal film moment was repeated three times and ten times. I counted, and saw her nipples pop out seventeen times. Yes, you read that correctly. Seventeen. Now I’m a big fan of naked breasts. I highly approve of women having them and showing them off. But there must be better ways to see them than watching Howling II.
Followed by: Howling III, Howling IV: The Original Nightmare, Howling V: The Rebirth, Howling VI: The Freaks, Howling: New Moon Rising