Jun 261982
 
two reels

Weird mad scientist Expedito Vitus (Wilson Grey), upset that people laughed at him over his claim of an elixir of life, takes up archeology briefly and discovers the mummy Runamb (Anselmo Vasconcelos). Things are looking up for the professor. His reputation has been repaired, he has a bubbling, curvaceous wife (Clarice Piovesan), and a mummy in the basement. Using his elixir, he resurrects the mummy, which he uses, along with his already immortal servant Igor (Felipe Falcao), to kidnap local girls for use in some kind of beast transformation experiment. Ah, but there’s a plucky reporter snooping around that could blow his whole scheme.

The Secret of the Mummy is terrible in the wonderful way that could only come from South American trash cinema. It’s a film that needs to be experienced once, though that is probably sufficient. Made in 1982, it looks like it was made in 1952, and with a minuscule budget. Watching it is an experience in unanswered questions. Why does the film switch between color and B&W? Why is there a long prologue where a dying man splits his map to the Egyptian tomb into eight pieces and gives them to his relatives, who are all then murdered? What is this experiment Vitus needs women for that pops up out of nowhere two-thirds of the way through the picture? Why does the professor have Arthur Frankenstein’s book on the mind (yes, that’s Arthur)? Why does Igor sing an operatic piece in the middle of the film? Why is there stock footage of a beauty pageant? And is this a comedy? Perhaps if I spoke Portuguese I could answer the last question, but the rest will remain mysteries.

secretofmummyThe Mummy doesn’t look like a mummy, but a guy with green gloves and a codpiece wrapped in modern bandages, but that doesn’t make him any worse than half the cinematic mummies. And I rather liked Runamb’s backstory as it isn’t the normal one. He was obsessed by a girl, so he bought slaves to have sex with and then murder. Apparently that was illegal in ancient Egypt, thus, one mummified psychopath. Sure, he was crazy, but less so than Vitus and Igor, who are really off the deep end.

There are plentiful topless women between the slaves of the past and the experimental victims of the present. I suppose it makes some sense for them to be bare breasted. At least it makes as much sense as anything in the film. There’s also a bit of gore than wouldn’t fool a toddler but does lead to a funny scene of Vitus chatting to a severed head.

The Secret of the Mummy is odd, rambling, and incoherent (enough so that I’ve read three reviews that get the basic plot wrong, or other copies have very different subtitles), but it isn’t boring.

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