Nov 121967
 
two reels

With the previous four Japanese Mars missions destroyed (maybe by a UFO, maybe not, but let’s not get too worried about little details like that), a new mission is set to go, with a manly-man captain, a goofy sidekick, a hot American Blonde, and a doctor who will soon be replaced by a grumpy American, as we keep spare Americans on the moon. Of course, they run into the UFO, which leaves bumps on the spaceship’s hull. Brought back to Earth, a bump turns into a giant chicken-lizard-triangle-thingy, codenamed Guilala for no good reason. Naturally Guilala wants to destroy a lot of miss-sized planes and tanks and stomp on some cardboard. What will the Japanese do?

It’s a comedy. No it isn’t. Yes it is. No it isn’t.

It would take so little effort to make this a comedy, but that wasn’t the intention. This is supposed to be a monster/action film, most likely aimed at kids. What it IS is silly, and that saves it. It is so ridiculous that it is fun.

We start off with jazzy tunes and giggly astronauts that tease each other about mistakes that could have been fatal because that’s what astronauts do. They also blast off in ships that are a cross between a seaplane and a sled, but to more jazzy tunes, so it’s OK. For the first half hour, I thought this might actually have been a very early parody.

If anything is clear about this primitive film, it is that money was every object. They didn’t have much. The chicken-lizard-triangle is laughable even by ‘60s giant monster standards. The miniatures look much like a child’s train setup (but to be fair, I had a pretty nice train setup). Perhaps my favorite is that the starscape is simply glued onto what is supposed to be the spaceship’s windows.

People’s bizarre behavior isn’t a matter of poor characterization. It is psychosis. For no reason the communication officer gets upset with the spaceship’s inhabitants and refuses to talk to them, even though she has necessary information to stop them from dying and was talking to them a moment earlier. Then she’s best friends with the Blonde. Then hates her, then best friends again. No one follows orders. And the grumpy Caucasian doctor goes nuts on the ship and attacks the other astronauts. A minute later, they’ve forgotten all about it and it is never discussed. Bondie also has some words about love and giant monsters which are…well…crazy.

Luckily, they can ease their insane thoughts with cocktail parties on the Moon. Flashy dresses just appear, as they would on the Moon, and the gang partys to lounge music.

Yes, it is lousy filmmaking, but The X from Outer Space isn’t boring, which puts it a notch above many of the Toho films that were technically far superior. As action or a monster film or science fiction, it is a joke. But it is a pretty goofy joke and who doesn’t like a joke?

I watched the older dub version, though you can get the film in Japanese with subs (if you like your cheese pure) or in a newer dub where the Americans all speak with German accents.